I just got back from vacation, which was quite relaxing…until I turned on the Emmy Awards last night. Just like last year, I found myself screaming at the TV on many occasions. But this time I was in a hotel room. In Vancouver. Where they aired the entire event without censoring any comments. I heart Canada.

However, after watching the Emmy Awards last night, I am convinced that very few of you who are eligible to vote actually watch television. Or at least more than the single screener episodes that are mailed to you.

Random Observations

1. Where was Drea de Matteo (Adrianna) last night when everyone who has ever appeared on The Sopranos reunited on stage? I still believe that Adrianna was alive and would resurface…don’t stop believin’?
   
2. Why don’t they hire Rainn Wilson to host one of these things? If they’re too afraid to hand over the hosting duties to the openly liberal Stewart or Colbert, then save us from Seacrest and give the mic to a funny everyman or woman.
   

Look, I’m not a member of any voting academy and I don’t claim to be an expert. I might come across as a bitter couch potato, but I’m just a passionate fan of television and high quality programming. And I am living off of vacation vapors at the moment. So please excuse me if I seem snarky or cranky, or if any spelling errors made their way into this post.

Good night.

According to TV Guide’s Michael Ausiello, actor Ken Leung will be joining the cast of Lost next season. His most recent and memorable role was as Uncle Junior’s cohort in the mental institution on The Sopranos.

I may never be first to the game, but I’m still a very interested player in the world of Lost scoop.

Here is my over-analytical perspective about what we see in this brief film:

There is an obvious candle theme relating to that Dharma Initiative actor/doctor. Marvin CANDLE, Mark WICKmund, Edmund HaloWAX. We have no idea if it is relevant to the show; more than likely it just a series of names that make Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse giggle.

In this clip, it appears that Dr. Candle/Wickmund/Halowax still has full use of his left arm and hand…which leads me to believe that it was filmed before the ‘incident’ that he refers to in the Orientation Video that Locke first watches in Desmond’s hatch. In a few of the other films, this character appears to have a prosthetic left arm and/or hand.

This is the third white bunny we’ve seen, but only the second one branded in sequential order with Hurley’s cursed numbers. The first was the #8 rabbit which Ben used to scare the bejesus out of Sawyer in “Every Man for Himself” (Season 3, episode 4). The second was Ben’s unmarked pet bunny, which we saw when pre-teen Ben first arrived on the island with his dad in “The Man Behind the Curtain” (Season 3, episode 20). And now this third white rabbit appears in the new Orientation film for Season 4, marked with the #15.

Bunnies have also made easter-egg appearances in many episodes past: Sawyer has been seen reading both Watership Down (rabbits are the main characters) and Of Mice and Men (protagonist is obsessed with rabbits). The unlucky Hurley found a rabbit’s foot in “Tricia Tanaka is Dead” (Season 3, episode 10). And who can forget the image late last season of Ben’s daughter Alex cooking fresh bunny rabbit over the fire for her next meal (yes, we’re aware of the symbolism, hating daddy and barbecuing his beloved bunny).

It looks like next season will continue with the Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland theme from past seasons. You know, a character overcome by curiosity discovers a secret new location. Locke and his hatches above ground, Charlie and the Looking Glass underwater. Jack’s search for his father on the island in Season 1′s “White Rabbit.” Season 4 will probably lead us to an entirely new locale, hopefully one which reveals where Flight Attendant Cindy, Sheriff Isabel and the kidnapped Tail Section kids live.

Rabbits have been known to represent fertility. We know that Juliet and the Others are certainly interested in that topic.

Moving on to another possible clue from this new Orientation Film…clones. It appears as if a second Bunny #15 magically appears on set, freaking everyone out. So if The Orchid isn’t a botanical station, as they state in the video, is it where the Dharma folks are experimenting with cloning? There have been a million theories throughout the history of Lost about human clones, and the release of that silly book Bad Twin did nothing but egg on that conspiracy. Of course it is probably just another bit of misdirection to get us geeks to obsess about that possibility until February. Of course the second bunny may be explained by…

The Casimir Effect, which is also mentioned in this video. So of course I had to look it up (I am a Lit major, not a Physics expert). Here is the shortest yet most comprehensive definition I could find: “An attractive force between two parallel, conducting plates in empty space that arises from zero-point quantum fluctuations of the vacuum electromagnetic field.” Um, exactly. What? We know that an electromagnetic field plays a large role on the island (see: Desmond’s now-imploded hatch, the computer and numbers which caused the anomaly and subsequent plane crash, Penny’s search team, etc.). But hey, as least the Casimir Effect mentions the word parallel…which could fuel the clone idea.

The Clockwork Orange brainwashing element that we were introduced to in “Not in Portland (Season 3, episode 7) also infiltrated The Orchid video. There were a few subliminal images quickly flashing throughout this Orientation Film, including what looks like a random tall building and Dharma founder Gerald DeGroot. We first saw Karl held captive, wearing LED glasses, being forced to watch a series of such messages in Room 23 at the Hydra Station on Other Island.

What? Don’t look at me that way. I’ve been home recovering from a minor medical thing for a few days and was thrilled to have something to do other than watch a continuous flow of disappointing indies.

Anyone care to elaborate about what you saw in this new Orientation Film or debunk any of my theories?

My guess is that we’ll find out he was being held captive on Naomi’s ship after she intercepted his attempt to leave with Walt on the boat that Ben gave him. As for the mysterious Walt and his growth spurt, who the hell knows when and where he’ll show up next.

I love television, but I’m not one of those people who sets my alarm to wake up ugly early to watch or listen to the nominee announcement show. I might be obsessed with certain shows, but I have to draw the line somewhere. Perhaps if I were a professional blogger, I’d make that commitment. Alas, I have an 8:30-5:30 job and like to sleep.

The most outrageous snub in this category, by far, is Lost. It is maddening that Boston Legal is there.  And let’s be honest, Grey’s Anatomy is an entertaining primetime soap, and last season the off-set drama was far more interesting than the onscreen storylines.

Frankly, even though I loved The Sopranos, I am kind of relieved that this was the last season. It will be one less series that Lost has to contend with next year.

ACTOR, DRAMA SERIES
Denis Leary, Rescue Me
Hugh Laurie, House
James Spader, Boston Legal
Kiefer Sutherland, 24
James Gandolfini, The Sopranos

You’re telling me that freaking James Spader is a better actor than Matthew Fox? Did the people with voting abilities not watch Lost this season, especially the second half? This is the one that makes me insane. And for crying out loud, where is Michael C. Hall’s nomination for Dexter? Is there a more charming and chilling character out there (besides Ben on Lost)?

With the exception of The Shat, this might be the best set yet. To me, it’s Emerson in a slam dunk. He saved the first half of Lost, and continues to be one of the creepiest characters on the small screen. If the voters lean on pure sentiment, then Imperioli gets the win. I love Heroes and Hiro, but it’s not his time. Yet.

ACTRESS, DRAMA SERIES
Kyra Sedgwick, The Closer
Sally Field, Brothers and Sisters
Mariska Hargitay, Law & Order: SVU
Edie Falco, The Sopranos
Minnie Driver, The Riches
Patricia Arquette, Medium

ACTRESS, COMEDY SERIES
America Ferrera, Ugly Betty
Tina Fey, 30 Rock
Julia Louis-Dreyfus, The New Adventures of Old Christine
Felicity Huffman, Desperate Housewives
Mary Louise Parker, Weeds

I’m sorry, but this one belongs to Jenna Fischer. I heart Pam Beesley. The end.
 
ACTOR, COMEDY SERIES
Tony Shalhoub, Monk
Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock
Ricky Gervais, Extras
Steve Carell, The Office
Charlie Sheen, Two and a Half Men

1. He the highest paid sitcom star on the air.
2. His off-camera crazytown behavior (see: 9/11 conspiracy theories, divorce details about threatening kids, porn, prostitution, gambling and drugs) has not affected his popularity one iota. Why is it that the media crucifies so many other celebrities for less egregious offenses?!

I’m on the Steve Carell bandwagon, although Alec Baldwin is 30 Rock. Unlike the disgustingly untouchable Sheen, however, the voters may be distracted by Baldwin’s recently publicized personal issues with his daughter.

REALITY SHOW
Antiques Roadshow
The Dog Whisperer With Cesar Millan
Extreme Makeover: Home Edition
Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List
Penn & Teller: Bull–

Again, I’m going with Bravo. Yeah, yeah, Extreme Makeover is touching and makes me cry. But Kathy Griffin makes me cry with laughter. Which I prefer.

INDIVIDUAL PERFORMANCE, VARIETY OR MUSIC PROGRAM
Ellen DeGeneres, “79th Annual Academy Awards”
Stephen Colbert, “The Colbert Report”
Jon Stewart, “The Daily Show With Jon Stewart”
David Letterman, “Late Show With David Letterman”
Tony Bennett, “Tony Bennett: An American Classic”

Phew. Thanks for sticking with me. I’m sure that after I let some of these nominations settle in my clouded brain, I’ll have more vitriol for the undeserving and outrage for the underappreciated.

was nominated for both Main Title Design and Original Main Title Theme Music.

If you like the show, you’ll enjoy these. Someone has taken the time to edit together the crash sequence in real time, the series of events which we have yet to see in sequential order (while Flight 815 is still in the sky, Desmond fails to punch in the numbers, and Benry is being left out of The Dysfunctional Others Book Club).

Longer version:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6PteH2A1Pw0