MEMORABLE CHARACTERS: WHO I LOVE ON TV & WHY
[Last August, I compiled a list of Favorite Television Characters Ever. Since that time I have modified it only slightly, and have decided to elaborate.]
Believe it or not, my world does not revolve entirely around a bunch of strangers with daddy and guilt issues who crashed onto a mysterious island. Lost isn’t even the first show I’ve been obsessed with (for years, I lived and breathed all things X-Files). I have a tendency to dive into a fair number of shows and discuss them with such fervor that friends and family tend to look at me askew and wonder privately if I have a life. Thankfully, I am also surrounded by people who speak the same language; who animatedly overanalyze and speculate about water-cooler shows like Grey’s Anatomy, Lost and The Office with me at length.
That being said, I’m going to break down exactly what I love about my favorite characters and personalities on television. Because although I do have a life, I also maintain a lifelong fascination and virtual relationship with a select group of primarily fictitious characters.
Before any of you fanatics jump all over my back about glaring omissions, keep in mind that I don’t actually have time to watch all popular shows and fan favorites like 24, Battlestar Galactica, CSI or Gilmore Girls.
So here is my updated list, with photos. Alphabetically, of course…
DR. MIRANDA BAILEY (CHANDRA WILSON), GREY’S ANATOMY
What’s not to love? She’s the boss but also the soul of the show.
CLAIRE BENNET (HAYDEN PANETTIERE), HEROES
DR. TEMPERANCE “BONES” BRENNAN (EMILY DESCHANEL), BONES
For me, Bones has been the perfect replacement for my beloved Scully; all business but with serious chemistry simmering just beneath the surface between her and her partner (David Boreanz, who is a sexier version of Mulder).
SHERIFF SETH BULLOCK (TIMOTHY OLYPHANT), DEADWOOD
He is so visibly conflicted and twitchy. That seething mustache snarl alone makes my day.
SYDNEY BRISTOW (JENNIFER GARNER), ALIAS
The ass-kicking + the outfits + the tech talk = Hot.
CAROL BURNETT, THE CAROL BURNETT SHOW
A hero of mine since childhood, I would run to the mirror after each episode to attempt to mimic her facial expressions.
ELAINE BENES (JULIA LOUIS-DREYFUS), SEINFELD
On top of the infamous dancing and that hair, she was the real star of the show.
CALAMITY JANE (ROBIN WEIGERT), DEADWOOD
No one else can slur words with such fortitude. I’m not sure I’ve ever loved a TV drunk so much.
ANGELA CHASE (CLAIRE DANES), MY SO-CALLED LIFE
No other show or actress captured and epitomized the awkward teenage years better.
CLAIRE FISHER (LAUREN AMBROSE), SIX FEET UNDER
Complicated and moody. The perfect undertaker’s daughter.
MARSHALL FLINKMAN (KEVIN WEISMAN), ALIAS
Every show should have a resident geek who comes to the rescue with such heart and loyalty.
TOBIAS FÜNKE (DAVID CROSS), ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT
Two words: never nude.
HENRY GALE/BEN LINUS (MICHAEL EMERSON), LOST
Creepy, surprising, and spectacularly acted.
TOMMY GAVIN (DENIS LEARY), RESCUE ME
What a mess of a man. Leary fits and fills the role like no other.
ARI GOLD (JEREMY PIVEN), ENTOURAGE
Perhaps it is because Piven embodies (to those of us outside of the industry) my perception of a real
JIM HALPERT (JOHN KRASINSKI), THE OFFICE
An obvious choice, but I’m on his bandwagon. I only wish I were as capable of clever office pranks and lingering glances that speak volumes.
JOHN LOCKE (TERRY O’QUINN), LOST
An enigma. I love that I have no idea what his real story is, nor the direction he’ll take us next on the show. In my opinion, he is the most important character on the show, and the key to all answers on the island and beyond.
DEXTER MORGAN (MICHAEL C. HALL), DEXTER
There are no characters currently on television quite like Dexter, a blood splatter analyst-by-day/vigilante-murderer-by-night. You will find yourself entirely enthralled and entertained by Hall; he is miles away from David on Six Feet Under, which is an impressive feat.
DETECTIVE FRANK PEMBLETON (ANDRE BRAUGHER), HOMICIDE: LIFE ON THE STREET
Just a great character played by an amazing actor. Powerful and mesmerizing.
ALICE PIESZECKI (LEISHA HAILEY), THE L WORD
She’s a writer, she’s sarcastic, and the only character I have ever liked or related to in any way during all four seasons of this frustrating show.
JO POLNIACZEK (NANCY MCKEON), THE FACTS OF LIFE
Besides the fact that her character shares my first name, she was also a tomboy, which made her the very first person on television that I ever related to on any level.
FELICITY PORTER (KERI RUSSELL), FELICITY
Oh how I long for the days of dormitory misadventures and melodrama with Felicity and her friends. For the record, I was on Team Noel from day one. Oh, and I liked the short hair.
VERN SCHILLINGER (JK SIMMONS), OZ
The most memorably menacing and vile character in recent television history. A complete monster, Simmons just nails it as the walking embodiment of evil.
AGENT DANA SCULLY (GILLIAN ANDERSON), THE X-FILES
Easily my favorite of all time. What can I say; I have a thing for scientists.
DR. JACK SHEPHARD (MATTHEW FOX), LOST
He wasn’t on my list until the beginning of Season 3. His intensity is quite palpable and convincing.
DETECTIVE ANDY SIPOWICZ (DENNIS FRANZ), NYPD BLUE
It’s as if we were watching a vat of water boil over with great fury. Fantastic.
CARMELA SOPRANO (EDIE FALCO), THE SOPRANOS
A long-suffering wife no longer, she owns every scene and is phenomenal.
AL SWEARENGEN (IAN MCSHANE), DEADWOOD
The eyes, the swagger, the language. One of my favorite shows of all time, and we only got three seasons. Very disappointing.
KEVIN WALKER (MATTHEW RHYS), BROTHERS & SISTERS
The industry can pat itself on the back as much as they want for the inclusion of gay and lesbian characters on popular shows, but never before has a show featured such a positive, everyday gay lead character like Kevin Walker. He is not a stereotype in any way, and it is refreshing to see his relationships explored in the same light as his television siblings’.
NORA WALKER (SALLY FIELD), BROTHERS & SISTERS
She is giving an Emmy-worthy performance as the matriarch in this criminally underrated series about family. I love all scenes between her and Calista Flockhart. The most welcome return to television in years.